Hello again! It's been quite a while since ive made a post talking about my life. A lot has changed in it since i last made a real post, i got a roomate, lost a roomate, lost my job, got a job, made a bunch of random coding stuff, made a guitar hero map, and so much more. This journal entry might be a bit long, but i will talk about music at the end so stick around! i guess starting off simple, back in april i lost my job. i was working at Canes, making chicken, but i ended up quitting when my cat gave birth and my roomate moved in. So much in my life changed so quick that i just couldn't handle it. My cat gave birth to SIX kittens! SIX!! That's way to many for me to handle! My life very quickly became a living hell, even with the extra time i had from not having to work. The kittens were very nice for about a month, but pretty much as soon as they turned 4 weeks old they started destroying everything. i don't wanna talk about it much (they still haunt me...). Only a few weeks ago were we able to give away the last kitten, so i'm finally down to just my own two cats. i also had a roomate for about 3 months. i hadn't shared a room with someone since i were 12, so suddenly sharing a room with someone again kinda sucked. i had to move my desk into the corner to make room for their bed, and they threw their desk in my closet. i went from having plenty of space in my room for my shelves and electronic junk and random goods, to no room at all. i wasn't upset that someone moved into my room, i was just upset about my loss of space. After about three months though they moved back out, and im back to having plenty of space again. My mental health has also been going on a complete roller coaster non-stop since my last update. I'm constantly brinking on being heavily depressed and insanely joyous. In march i wrote down something that describes it pretty well, "one of the scariest things is when your mental health starts improving, but you can’t pinpoint what’s causing it. you have no idea when it’s going to crash back down". For pretty much as long as i remember, my mental health has been going up and down and up and down over and over. It's currently going up (which is why i feel like writing this), but i'm just not sure how long its gonna last... Some better news, I've been getting more into baking and cooking! i'm incredibly bad at cooking, but im getting better! i can now cook some pretty basic meals WITHOUT burning them!! Baking on the other hand, i've been pretty good at! i've always been someone decent a baking (since its basically just following instructions, and thats what im best at!), but recently i've been trying to bake more and more. i've made some pretty good banana bread recently! If i ever make a gallery page on my site (which i have planned..) i'll post some pictures of it. Speaking of adding to the site, i plan on finally implementing my projects page! i've been working more and more on various coding projects, and i want to share them! i'm not actually sure how im gonna organize everything just yet, i might have it sorted kinda like the journal page, or i might organize it like the (yet to be implemented) images page. I made a simple app on my iphone which just loads all the albums saved to my spotify library and selects one a random for me to listen to. It's simple, but its the first thing ive actually made for an apple device, and it'll probably be the last, it sucked. I also made a pretty simple program while i was messing around with c++, all it does it take an image and sort the pixels in various ways. i wont go into much detail now, but you'll see it when i make either of the new pages. i've also been working on some games in the background. None of them are quite ready to be really posted about, but i will talk about one of them for a bit. It's a first person roguelike that kinda plays like the elderscrolls 2. It's roughly based on a mix of the binding of isaac and daggerfall. i've started reading JoJo! i loved watching the anime last year, so i figured i might as well give the manga a shot. I started reading it about 4 months ago, but stopped halfway into part 2 because i hated reading it on my tiny phone screen. A few weeks ago my sister got me a kinda shitty android tablet, but its got a big screen! i pretty much immediately picked up reading JoJo again, and now i'm about halfway into part 4! i definitely like the manga a lot more, since its got alot better pacing. The fights and encounters arent streched to fill an episode or two, but instead they just flow naturally. Part 3 didn't feel as long, and they fights felt alot smoother. i've been really struggling with BPD for the past few years, and one of the things about it is that dating becomes very hard for me. My emotions tend to be very on or off, black or white. i jump from loving someone to hating them over the smallest, tiniest things. so for the past 2~ish years i've been avoiding dating anyone, cause i knew it would just make me miserable, and it would just hurt the other person. A few weeks ago however, i decided it might be time to try again.. maybe it was because i rushed into it, or maybe i just didn't like them much, or maybe i'm just not ready yet, but it didn't last long. i really enjoyed it for the first few days, but then this sense of anxiety/guilt kept creeping it's way up inside me... i'm not sure why i got so anxious so quick, but i had to cut things off and that made me feel even worse for a time. i threw someone else into my shitty emotional roller coaster, and it obviously hurt them. Maybe i'll be ready to try again in another year, i'm just not sure. Some different news, i've been getting way more into guitar hero! i've been trying to play it for an hour or so every few days so i can keep getting better, but im already kinda decent at the game i think. i can play most 3/4 difficutly songs on expert. After thinking about it some, i figured i might be kinda good at making my own chart, so i gave it a go! i charted "Untitled" by Scratch21, since no Scratch21 songs have been charted before. i think i did pretty good! "You can find it here." Also, me and a bunch of friends have been playing lethal company pretty often since january, and we usually take clips of funny things that happen, so we went and edited them all together into one big video! "You should watch it!" Well thats pretty much it for now! I can't really think of much else i want to talk about, other than some music! i feel like linking a bunch of albums ive been listening to recently, so i'm going to do just that! While i was typing this journal entry, i was listening to "Ants From Up There" by Black Country, New Road. i've also been really enjoying "Tomorrow Is Nearly Yesterday and Everyday Is Stupid" by Crywank, "Gaburger" by Gezebelle Gaburgably, "you'll be fine" by Hot Mulligan, "SMILE! :D" and "Worlds" by Porter Robinson, and "Good & Evil" by Tally Hall. That's it for today! See yall next time!